Divorce is never easy for children or parents. However, being raised by feuding parents can be even harder on a child. If you are getting a divorce, it can be difficult to put your children’s needs first. There are a few easy rules to follow that can make things easier for both you and your children during this difficult time.
1.  Never Negotiate in Front of Your Children
Everyone deserves some innocence in their childhoods. You and your soon to be ex should not discuss issues concerning your relationships in front of the children. You should pick a time to settle your differences when they’re not around.
2.  Go to a Family Counselor
A licensed marriage and family therapist can help you and your children cope with a divorce and your plans for the future. They are trained in talking to children about divorce. They can also help you learn how to communicate respectfully with your ex-spouse.
3.  If Either of You Has Substance Abuse Problems, Get Treatment
The end of any relationship is hard and it can be tempting to self-medicate. However, if you have a problem with drugs or alcohol, it may affect your ability to parent your children effectively and it may affect your custody arrangement.
There is no shame in seeking treatment. A treatment center will be staffed with trained professionals, who can help you to detoxify. They can also provide group therapy and individual counseling.
4.  Hire a Divorce Attorney
No matter how amicable your divorce might be, you wouldn’t be getting divorced if you agree on everything. Hiring a divorce lawyer is always a good idea especially if your spouse has one. An attorney will know the law well and be able to act as an objective third-party.
5.  Decide Who the Custodial Parent Will Be
The parent the child lives with should be the one who can provide the best care. Circumstances such as location, economic stability, and work schedule should be taken into consideration. Both your attorney and your marriage and family counselor can help you with this.
6.  Make a Child Support Arrangement
The non-custodial parent will be expected to pay child support. Child support payments may be made through the Kansas Payment Center. The payments are based on income and assets. Your attorney can help you determine the exact amount.
7.  Strive to Let Your Children Stay in Their Home
If it is possible, the custodial parent should stay in the family home with the children. It will give the children a sense of stability during a time that can feel uncertain.
8.  Do not Communicate Through Your Children
Children should never be used as a go-between in the divorce. You should always remain on speaking terms with your co-parent and discuss anything having to do with custody with one another.
9.  Do not Bad Mouth Your Ex-Partner to the Child
Your kid is not your confidant. You should never gossip about your spouse or make them seem like the enemy to your child.
10.                Listen to Your Kids
Like anyone else, children want to feel heard. Ask them what their concerns are. Never make any assumptions about their thoughts or feelings.
Divorce is never fun for anyone but it can go more smoothly with the proper planning. Visit thebrightfamilylawcenter.com for more information.
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